Emotional Mastery - 7 Ways to Regain Control of Your Emotions

Do you ever feel like your emotions are controlling you instead of the other way around?

How do you handle feeling out of control and overwhelmed?

 Do you want to regain control over your emotions without beating yourself up about feeling that way in the first place? Try these seven ways to regain control of your emotions.

You’ll be glad you did!

1) Say It Out Loud

There are a lot of ways you can regain control over your emotions. One method is to take a minute and name the emotion out loud, which can make the sting of the feeling dissipate or at the very least lessen, because you're acknowledging it.

It might sound strange, and it's been proven in studies that speaking aloud your negative thoughts can make them seem less powerful and worrisome because they're now shared with other people (who know they're not true) instead of being kept all bottled up inside where they build into something even bigger. And who wants to hang on to that kind of energy that can just be so draining and de-motivating. You deserve so much more than that  

2) Recite Loving Affirmations

Reciting loving affirmations are simple, powerful steps to take the moment where you feel like the world is caving in on you and flip the script. They can help us maintain a sense of calm and stability by reminding us that all is well, shift our energy and rewire our thinking to be more loving and nurturing. Affirmations can serve as a support system during times when we feel most vulnerable and unsure. Sometimes, when we are in need of reassurance and self-care, reciting uplifting thoughts can be all it takes for our moods to shift into a more positive state of being. Are yougame to give it a try?

Reciting positive affirmations is one way to calm yourself and take control. The more you speak them, the more they will resonate in your subconscious mind and help you automatically find solutions to whatever is causing you stress.

Here are some examples:

I am enough

I deserve my best

Every day I grow and evolve.

Affirmations also serve as a coping mechanism when we are not able to see things clearly, and when we can't see past our fears and anxieties. If you're feeling frustrated with a situation that doesn't seem like it's going anywhere, sometimes the best thing you can do is talk out your feelings with someone who understands what you're going through, that you trust & feel comfortable with.

One way to get started with reciting loving affirmations is by first writing them down so they are fresh in your mind. Download some for free here

3) Write About Your Feelings

Writing about our feelings can be cathartic and provides the opportunity for us to put the story out there, often leaving us questioning its validity when we see it on paper. In this way, we are not alone with our emotions and instead can tell (and re-tell) our story in a way that may provide validation and/or solace.

It may also help you to gain a firmer understanding about where your emotions come from in the first place. We don't always have control over how we feel, but what we do with those feelings might offer a chance for change. And isn’t that worth your time and energy?

4) Debrief With Someone

Another thing you can do is debrief your experience, thoughts and/ or feelings with someone and be open about how you feel. This may be a family member, friend, therapist, or even a close colleague. It's important that you don't try to hide anything in the conversation and avoid exaggerating your feelings- it is normal to feel embarrassed or scared after going through something difficult. Honesty is the best policy when trying to regain control over our emotions! It is also important to acknowledge this is an extremely raw and vulnerable process that takes time (and sometimes quite a long time).

I know for myself and my journey it took time to build up trust and a connection with my psychologist before I could truly open up about my challenges, frustrations and areas I needed her support. Do you have someone close to you that you can turn to?  

5) Take A Self-Care Day

Self-care can be an uncomfortable experience or even one we may feel is a little frivolous. What I have found is that it’s so important to give ourselves permission and schedule the time to fully care for ourselves – whatever that may look like for you. Think reading in your garden or in a nearby park, drawing/ painting etc, catching up with friends for dinner, going to see a concert, getting a massage or facial, watching your favourite TV series/ movie, the list goes on doesn’t it…..

I guess the key here is finding what does self-care mean for you?

Can you set aside a day where you have no obligations or tasks to do, take the day off, and give yourself the time you need without worrying about anything else.

This may look different for everyone because of our schedules and lifestyles, but here are a few ideas for a self-care day that work for me:

  1. Take a nice bath or shower with my favorite products;
  2. Sleep in as long as I need; Have a healthy breakfast (or something light if I’m not hungry);
  3. Eat lunch on my own schedule rather than at noon like I might do at work;
  4. Read for as long as I want to without feeling guilty about not doing something more productive;
  5. Turn off all electronics and spend some time outside enjoying nature. There are also many free resources online, like this blog post!

What will you try?

6) Drink Herbal Tea

I know it sounds lame, and the simplest and most effective way I found to get myself out of a negative or sad place is by drinking herbal tea. The soothing aroma and the warmth of the drink helped ground me, while also settling my nerves. The ritual of tea making allowed me to focus on my breathing and slow it down, also reducing any underlying anxiety.

Drink in moderation (obviously) because while some herbal teas are more nutritious than others, they can still contain caffeine or sugar and other added ingredients which can make you more stressed if consumed too heavily.

Some good options for calming tea include chamomile, peppermint, spearmint, lemon balm, and lavender.

Tea And Wellness

Tea is a common beverage in Asia, though it can be found in many other parts of the world as well. Tea typically contains Camellia sinensis (tea plant) leaves that are brewed or boiled and then cooled until served.

There are many types of tea, each having a different flavor and health benefits depending on the ingredients used for brewing.

Loose Leaf Tea

One way to gain back control of your emotions is by using loose leaf tea. This can be both a therapeutic and relaxation technique, or it can just be a simple ritual you do each day before going out.

Healthy Beverages

When we are feeling emotional, often times the best thing we can do is to move our bodies and stay hydrated.

Here are some healthy beverages that you might want to try:

-Water -Almond milk (unsweetened)

-Hazelnut coffee latte

-Green juice.

A healthy beverage that I like to consume is a green juice. I enjoy it because I get my greens, and it gives me energy.

You can add cucumber, kale, celery, spinach, ginger root and lemon or orange in your juicer for a healthy dose of fresh nutrients that your body craves. This will keep you going! 

Healthy Tea

We all have negative thoughts from time to time, it's normal and nothing is wrong with you. It's important to stay positive, but there are some days when we just can't seem to shake off a bad mood. That is where Healthy Teacomes in!

Drink a warm cup before bed or during the day and recite these seven steps - they'll take your mood from dark to bright in no time.

7) Go For A Walk

Walking is a great way to clear your head and regain emotional control, so grab your keys and go for a walk. Take time for yourself and don't worry about what others might think. Allow yourself the serenity of going at your own pace; this will help you feel back in charge of your everyday and elevate your mood.

Allow the cool, brisk air fill your lungs as you go.

Breathe in deeply; slowly exhale out. Repeat if needed until you feel more in control and grounded in who you are rather than your emotions that make you reactive towards others


The key is simple. Be kind, show respect and take the time to put yourself in a more positive space. We know this isn't always easy, and it's so worth it. Remember, life is full of change, trials and tribulations and sometimes emotions can get the best of us.

Please don't beat yourself up if you need some help or just a bit more time when things are tough, after all you're human too!

Just remember that there's always light at the end of the tunnel, even if it doesn’t seem that way at the time! Look back of how far you have come through your seasons of life and where you have overcome something challenging. And remember, it is more than ok to feel how you feel, grace yourself with their presence and trust in it being a process that will pass and will teach you along the way.

I wish you the best month ahead, if you love this month’s topic I’d love to know or if there’s a blog topic you’d like me to craft, please reach out. I’d love to hear from you.

Best wishes

Di and Lady xx

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